Back when I first started this blog, I was in a very different space then I am right now. After 10 years of inconsistently writing on and off again here, I’m amazed that I actually kept this blog still going! Back then it wasn’t very cool to blog with the existence and ever expanding reach of online video content. Now over a decade later, it’s even less cool to be honest but I just prefer the pen over the camera lens.
At the beginning, this was a platform for me to share my thoughts on a variety of topics and to this day it’s still that same space for me. Has the audience grown since 2015? Yes barely, but that was never the point. My aim for this blog is that you would see the honest reflections of my life and how I am on the way with Jesus. Communing with him at his table. Walking into even greater relationship with him.
It’s in celebration of the 10 years of this blog that I would like to pause and reflect on my second ever post simply called Waiting. How with the wisdom I have gathered in the last decade I can respond to a younger man who didn’t know his way. Didn’t know the future or what God had in store down the road on the critical journey. But first, here’s what I originally wrote all those years ago:
“This season of my life has been an interesting one. It has not been like previous seasons such as the time of intense spiritual warfare that lasted the duration of my first two years of high school. That was when I led a Christian club called “First Priority” at Eaglecrest High School.
On the other hand, it is also different than the season filled with teaching opportunities where God gave me the ability to lecture on why the Bible can be trusted, as well as teach in my church’s high school youth group on Titus 2:11-15. There was also the occasional spiritual small talk at work or school last year which was amazing to take part in with those who wrestled with certain concepts. Things like the Ontological Argument, “Is Catholicism Christian and can Christians be Catholic?”, and the small discussions concerning the existence of God.
But this season is different. It is different because in my life there is usually something huge I have to overcome and can only do so with the help of God. But this season does not have a mountain to conquer. It has no valley to explore or dark cavern of tribulation to go through, but is simply a time of waiting.
This season is significant because I have not had this much time to breath and look back at what I have gone through in my life. I do not like it that much either because I love to do things and accomplish great things that have purpose, but instead I am sitting on the sidelines as everyone else gets a turn at bat. I have friends who are getting married, having children, moving out, traveling the world, going on missions trips, and so much more. Then here I am just waiting for the next unexpected journey that God has for me.
Probably the funniest part of this season is that I do not know what I am waiting for or what lies ahead in my life! Is it marriage? No, God has told me to wait. Is it a missions trip? No, God has told me that that is neither my calling nor my purpose in life for now. Is it a career? No, God has told me that I am not ready and must first go to college to receive my education.
So what is it that I am so desperate to start? I have no idea. All I can do for now is wait. As I wait on the LORD, this passage comes to mind as I wait for my turn to hit a home run for the LORD:
Luke 16:10 (NKJV)
“He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is also unjust in much.”
Some other passages of scripture that come to mind are Acts 2:42 (NKJV), 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 (NASB), and Isaiah 40:29-31 (NKJV) during this season of preparing for my next adventure with the LORD my God. In the meantime, I have been keeping my mind, body, and most importantly, my spiritual state active. I have been studying and reading about the history of Christianity, working out to maintain my body which God has given me, and staying up to date on current events as the world gets closer to its dying day.
I have also spent a lot more time focused on the five basics of Christian living: reading the Bible, studying the Bible, memorizing portions of the Bible, praying, and sharing the gospel. So as I wait on the LORD during this time in my life, maybe this little blog-post can encourage you to stand strong and press on in your faith as maybe some of you wait on the LORD as well. With that, Godspeed and Jesus bless!”
I laughed when I read that I experienced “intense spiritual warfare” as if the worst in life had already happened! If only I knew how unprepared I’d be for the intensity of the next decade. The highs and lows of living in this broken world. To think I needed more is both impressive and youthfully stupid.
For context, in mid-July of 2015 I would’ve just turned 18 in the previous month and was going to start classes at the Colorado Film School in the Fall. In other words, I thought I knew everything and had it all figured out. As I’m now 28, I in fact do not have life figured out. Life just got more difficult and will be even more difficult if I get to be 38 or 48 down the road.
I’m taking things one day at a time now that I’m a Dad and approaching the 3rd year anniversary of marriage to my wonderful bride. Keeping in mind that God could graciously give me many days beyond tomorrow or he could, in his right timing, call me home. I want God’s will, God’s way. All day, everyday.
In this season, I’m still learning the same lesson in new ways. Currently about 100 pages into a book I’ve hinted at for years that one day I hope to publish. Hopefully later this year if all goes to my plan, but then again I want it to be published when it’s done right. No need to rush the process. I can wait.
Falling more and more in love with my wife. Learning how to father my infant daughter. Studying to show myself approved every time I walk up to the pulpit when I’m called to do so. Always growing in God.
Absolutely beyond blessed with the life I have today and excited with where it’s going to go next. Grateful for all God has given me and for all of you that have followed this blog through the years. Here’s to another 10 if the Lord is willing. With that, Godspeed and Jesus bless.
Footnotes
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